tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-84115139742270187542024-03-06T02:14:24.421+00:00Favoured Girl's BlogMy musings about life, things I observe around me, and the phases I go through as I discover myself, my purpose and my passions.Favoured Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06799796628809329966noreply@blogger.comBlogger183125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8411513974227018754.post-44621126670371599762012-03-27T10:00:00.000+01:002012-03-27T10:54:00.198+01:00(Female) Family Politics<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtbVEUkdiu25PHtD9iVl4lQcPDoj2dK0XNnj6qk7nhUjNvokvjRF8gZFQpRokqo5KPmtG2T2K233jJ0N8bDbDpLRP8ZXV7CwoRCSsN9zKTtXnnaO5tuBzgkY3OjvkBpJ2vur7_DgY4eJM/s1600/asa_beautiful_imperfection.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtbVEUkdiu25PHtD9iVl4lQcPDoj2dK0XNnj6qk7nhUjNvokvjRF8gZFQpRokqo5KPmtG2T2K233jJ0N8bDbDpLRP8ZXV7CwoRCSsN9zKTtXnnaO5tuBzgkY3OjvkBpJ2vur7_DgY4eJM/s200/asa_beautiful_imperfection.jpg" width="195" /></a></div>
I'm a big fan of Asa and I love both her albums. I've listened to both albums over and over again. She's such a great lyricist and all the words in her song make sense. She talks about life as she sees it - whether it is relationships, culture, family problems, politics, war and so on.<br />
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One of my favourite songs on her second album (Beautiful Imperfection) is Bimpe. I love the simplicity of the music and the beats, but above all, the song tells a story. It is the story of an unnamed character, and Bimpe is her boyfriend (or husband)'s younger sister. But they do not get on at all. The narrator accuses Bimpe of overstepping her boundaries, of disrespect, saying bad things about her and of sticking her nose into her private affairs.<br />
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Now in Yoruba culture, a wife is supposed to respect all her husband's family members, even if they are younger than her. Perhaps this Bimpe takes advantage of that culture and is rude and disrespectful of her brother's wife because she knows that the wife cannot openly confront her. So in the song, the narrator is trying to send Bimpe a warning to back off and stop disturbing her relationship with her brother.<br />
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I tried to imagine myself in that situation.Thankfully, I have a great relationship with my hubby's sisters who are lovely people. But we hear so many horror stories of wife and in-law battles, or the political games that both sides try to play to keep the peace even if they don't get on well. I have friends who are happily married, apart from the fact that they don't like members of their husband's family. And I have friends who don't particularly like the lady that their brother is dating or married to. </div>
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It also seems to be a woman thing, for some reason. I don't hear of wives having battles with their father-in-law or brother-in-law. It's usually the husband's female relatives that are hostile to his wife. I wonder why. Are we females so selfish and possessive that we feel we have to protect our "territory"? Do we see the new woman in a son or brother's life as a threat to our own position? Is there no room in a man's life for other women apart from his immediate family? Questions, questions.....</div>
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Anyway, back to Asa's song about Bimpe. Someone needs to tell her to chill and back off - that's what the narrator is saying. It almost sounds like <b>"Your brother loves me, deal with it."</b> I love the way the narrator even calls Bimpe out on some of her own issues - Bimpe is unmarried but she has a child out of wedlock. Bimpe has no manners, but she is looking for a husband to marry. Bimpe, fix your issues and stop minding other people's business!</div>
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My other favourite song on the album is "Ore", that's another very interesting story. We'll save that for another day....</div>
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<i>Did I tell you I looooooooooooove Asa? Here's a photo of me posing like Asa. The photographer knew I was a huge fan, so he handed me the guitar to pose with. I wish I could actually play though!</i></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4kA3X8MzwerKaZATNRVhFFmz-mdO6mCx5tns0DJSBs9gCi1QExCnJUstaZfN2oEv2jcsbVMqMRGGBH8oCf4_69dO5YWt790VC7bmsSQZoYj5-cQ_N1NExQsH5dVoJ8sB68AAoUrojXrQ/s1600/Posing+as+Asa.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4kA3X8MzwerKaZATNRVhFFmz-mdO6mCx5tns0DJSBs9gCi1QExCnJUstaZfN2oEv2jcsbVMqMRGGBH8oCf4_69dO5YWt790VC7bmsSQZoYj5-cQ_N1NExQsH5dVoJ8sB68AAoUrojXrQ/s320/Posing+as+Asa.jpg" width="215" /></a></div>
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(c) Tolulope Popoola</div>
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<br /></div><div class="blogger-post-footer">Tolulope Popoola: Writer, Blogger, Publisher, Dreamer, Bookworm.
Blog: http://www.onwritingandlife.com
Facebook: http://facebook.com/TolulopePopoola
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TolulopePopoola
Publishing: http://www.accomplishpress.com</div>Tolulope Popoolahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04824894132453805811noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8411513974227018754.post-34305852150750438682011-10-22T00:34:00.004+01:002011-10-24T17:19:58.720+01:00Blowing My Trumpet<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjZyr1YKAYIqOTMpqGzbmM1wbiT-UD8zEbBG0Bs0y4gMt0UlKR_mhwh_Mh-SxVo3mrd2fDAK4Nb1VDp9DckjCvtwGUl79qurzRk64Oc6ZQoOe0obr5JtSt6W1L1rFMi7wHgBQ0BKKR86KI/s1600/trumpet.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjZyr1YKAYIqOTMpqGzbmM1wbiT-UD8zEbBG0Bs0y4gMt0UlKR_mhwh_Mh-SxVo3mrd2fDAK4Nb1VDp9DckjCvtwGUl79qurzRk64Oc6ZQoOe0obr5JtSt6W1L1rFMi7wHgBQ0BKKR86KI/s200/trumpet.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>I've been tagged (<b>and nagged</b>) by <a href="http://alotedbabe.blogspot.com/">Aloted</a> so I came to update my blog. It was well overdue! Honestly, I've had the urge to blog several times, but I can't seem to find enough hours in the day. And every little creative spark I have at the moment is going towards my professional writing. But anyway, back to the post:<br />
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<a href="http://alotedbabe.blogspot.com/">Aloted</a> and<a href="http://life-nolimit.blogspot.com/"> NoLimit</a> came up with this idea for us to reflect and think about ten really positive attributes about us. (Here's the link to Aloted's post -<b> <a href="http://alotedbabe.blogspot.com/2011/09/blowing-my-trumpet.html">here</a></b>). I thought it was a great idea as Aloted mentioned, somehow we find it easy to remember the negative aspects of our character and we ignore the positives. So this got me thinking... and it was slow at first, but soon I was able to come up with more than ten good things about me.<br />
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So here goes:<br />
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<b>Adaptable:</b> I find that I can adjust to situations easily. Sometimes the fear of the unknown gets me worried, but once I'm in a situation, I can adjust and adapt easily.<br />
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<b>Generous:</b> I'm able to give and share easily. If I have something and someone else is in need, I will give. I actually find it enjoyable to give because I like it when the recipient is happy. Sharing my stuff comes easy to me too.<br />
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<b>Dedicated:</b> I don't commit to things easily, but once I do, there's no going back. I will make sure I see it through to the end. Whether it's a relationship, a project, an idea, etc.<br />
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<b>Creative:</b> Of course. I have to be, I was created by an awesomely creative God, lol. I find that the more I express my creativity, the more I get creative ideas. Whether it's in writing, cooking, interior design, problem-solving, or other things, I enjoy coming up with something new and different.<br />
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<b>Curious: </b>Not about gossip or other people's business, lol. I have a thirst for life and knowledge. I love to read, to travel, to explore, to experience new things. I love to ask questions about the big issues in life.<br />
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<b>Optimistic:</b> I like to see things in a positive light. I function better when I'm positive about the outcomes of any task. I'm drawn towards happy, good, positive things. I like to dream big and hope for the best all the time. I can't stand negativity, it drags me down.<br />
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<b>Loyal: </b>I just am. I haven't got many friends, but I am very loyal to the ones I have. I don't think it's fair to betray anyone, much less someone that considers you a friend.<br />
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<b>Thoughtful:</b> I consider all angles before I speak or act. I don't like to feel that I acted rashly or unfairly towards anyone, so I go out of my way to avoid that. If it was unavoidable or unintentional, I always apologise.<br />
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<b>Team-Player:</b> I can work very well in a team. I like to share tasks, do my part and make sure that everyone else is doing their part too. I will happily offer to help out other members so that the whole team achieves its goals.<br />
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<b>Gentle:</b> I'm usually calm and gentle, not a lot stresses me out. I don't like aggression or drama so I stay well away from it. I like my peace of mind too much to go looking for trouble.<br />
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There we are! I really enjoyed doing this, actually. I should recall this post from time to time, when I'm tempted to beat myself up.<br />
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So to share this, I would like to tag: <a href="http://dollchic.blogspot.com/">Doll</a>, <a href="http://www.lightherlamp.com/">Jaycee</a>, <a href="http://www.laradanielswrites.com/">Lara Daniels</a>, <a href="http://justdoyin.wordpress.com/">Just Doyin</a>, <a href="http://amarasviewonstuff.blogspot.com/">Believer</a>, <a href="http://www.verastic.com/">Vera</a>, <a href="http://simeoneomobaba.blogspot.com/">Simeone</a>, <a href="http://yellowsisiunspoken.blogspot.com/">Yellow Sisi</a>, <a href="http://shortysdiary.blogspot.com/">Shorty</a>, <a href="http://www.justjoxy.wordpress.com/">Just Joxy</a>, <a href="http://enobongekpott.blogspot.com/">Enybee</a>, <a href="http://jhazmyn.blogspot.com/">Jhazmyn</a>, ... okay, EVERYONE who has commented on my blog this year!<br />
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Stay blessed and favoured!<br />
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FG<div class="blogger-post-footer">Tolulope Popoola: Writer, Blogger, Publisher, Dreamer, Bookworm.
Blog: http://www.onwritingandlife.com
Facebook: http://facebook.com/TolulopePopoola
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TolulopePopoola
Publishing: http://www.accomplishpress.com</div>Tolulope Popoolahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04824894132453805811noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8411513974227018754.post-90371501087733387362011-07-27T00:23:00.002+01:002011-07-27T00:28:29.109+01:00Back From My Break*clears dust off blog*<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipN57q632xrQbul6TrJ_lSt2f2LGKibjpHQJ4Pq-4AxAhgEXiZhFVmuWb7RmCTvROxSzb6FFJShBGoSm1NTFm2nlXba_5qya7pPa7-XKCvdoaRwN6GeP3wlPbJ2lxi87MYZCiJnElcnwI/s1600/back+to+work.PNG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="136" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipN57q632xrQbul6TrJ_lSt2f2LGKibjpHQJ4Pq-4AxAhgEXiZhFVmuWb7RmCTvROxSzb6FFJShBGoSm1NTFm2nlXba_5qya7pPa7-XKCvdoaRwN6GeP3wlPbJ2lxi87MYZCiJnElcnwI/s200/back+to+work.PNG" width="200" /></a><br />
<div style="text-align: justify;">Hi friends! It has been ages since I updated this blog. It almost feels strange to be writing here. In the past seven months or so, all of my thoughts have been gathering in my head, but I didn't have the time or energy to blog, so I just usually jotted down the important stuff that I <i>really</i> didn't want to forget. I remember a time (long ago) when I could update my blogs almost every day with any random thought that pops into my head.</div><br />
<div style="text-align: justify;">Many, many thanks to you all for your kind wishes, thoughts and prayers towards me and my family. I really appreciate them and I pray that God will bless you in return. I am thankful for this new phase in my life. It's an odd feeling; knowing that I'm still me, but also knowing that my life has changed irreversibly. Having little FG around means so many different things on so many levels. Well, one of them is that I'm her first role model, so I have to behave myself! lol. I'm also thinking that this is where I need God more than ever before. I now pray that God, if I ever fail in anything in life, please let me not fail at being a parent.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">So I'm slowly getting back to my (somewhat) normal routine (working round the little babe) and I'mgetting back to my work. I've started writing in little bursts again. I'm also devouring books like crazy, they're helping me to get my creative juices flowing. Previously, I thought my creativity had dried up cos my brain had switched completely into mummy mode. It felt good to take a break for a while, but it also feels great to be back, doing what I love.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">I want to issue an apology to the fans and readers of our series <a href="http://inmydreamsitwassimpler.blogspot.com/">In My Dreams It Was Simpler</a> for the abrupt way we ended the public posts on the blog. Rest assured that I haven't forgotten my promise to keep you up to date with what happens next. So I've decided to continue working on Lola and Wole's story and have it as a separate book. I'll keep you guys posted with my progress on it. If you were not following the series before now, this is the time to catch up with the story because the conclusion is going to be hot!</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div>So here's my quick update for now people, I hope to be back soon!<br />
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Stay blessed and favoured,<br />
FG<div class="blogger-post-footer">Tolulope Popoola: Writer, Blogger, Publisher, Dreamer, Bookworm.
Blog: http://www.onwritingandlife.com
Facebook: http://facebook.com/TolulopePopoola
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TolulopePopoola
Publishing: http://www.accomplishpress.com</div>Tolulope Popoolahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04824894132453805811noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8411513974227018754.post-48950058997834024752011-03-30T16:17:00.001+01:002011-03-30T18:38:56.254+01:00Baby Favoured Girl<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiml84PmvPcxkUc6uiCa8kX90Aftltz-lPmX4eMv85JxaUbllq3mbejx3i6XMveUZb_MQ7sdg9epmivta_aQ0RXi32YcXkhJ_jfFvpToqfyj6GHgQZVYEuK_OnE86k3uwpoJaK7ThquRVM/s1600/babygirl.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiml84PmvPcxkUc6uiCa8kX90Aftltz-lPmX4eMv85JxaUbllq3mbejx3i6XMveUZb_MQ7sdg9epmivta_aQ0RXi32YcXkhJ_jfFvpToqfyj6GHgQZVYEuK_OnE86k3uwpoJaK7ThquRVM/s200/babygirl.jpg" width="193" /></a></div>Yes, that title is right - there's a little favoured girl in my life now! And I'm so blessed and thankful to God for giving hubby and I this wonderful gift. She's changed my life since she came at the end of January, and I wouldn't have it any other way.<br />
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When I found out I was pregnant early last summer, I was so excited, yet nervous about many things. I had a thousand and one questions about pregnancy, about childbirth and about becoming a parent. I read books, browsed several websites, spoke to other mums and expectant women, attended all the recommended classes, etc etc. But still nothing prepared me for the overwhelming feelings I get when I look at her. Right from the first scan when I saw the tiny heart beating, till this moment when she smiled in her sleep.<br />
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So FG is now a mummy - yay! That explains why I've been missing from my blogs and the internet in general. I decided last December that I was going to give myself a few months of 'maternity leave'. Gradually I'll get back to blogging and writing once again but for now, I'm taking things slowly, enjoying motherhood and adjusting to different priorities.<br />
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Stay blessed everyone!<br />
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FG<div class="blogger-post-footer">Tolulope Popoola: Writer, Blogger, Publisher, Dreamer, Bookworm.
Blog: http://www.onwritingandlife.com
Facebook: http://facebook.com/TolulopePopoola
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TolulopePopoola
Publishing: http://www.accomplishpress.com</div>Tolulope Popoolahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04824894132453805811noreply@blogger.com36tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8411513974227018754.post-84937213303989466502010-11-29T22:05:00.003+00:002011-11-11T22:17:40.589+00:00Need to Compare?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhzXj1pGXJWKtPGknf9rWXHcElB_MbqmSAOtvusET4xVSKIsANO7Kx47JJC1SoZ579RRGuMWjusc_lNPU3lQOhXE63H5Xs8qP-pm_HQIAX2dOY3ow_9Y79MjYrFBL9WUwz-3wv85DdE_x0/s1600/compare.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="120" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhzXj1pGXJWKtPGknf9rWXHcElB_MbqmSAOtvusET4xVSKIsANO7Kx47JJC1SoZ579RRGuMWjusc_lNPU3lQOhXE63H5Xs8qP-pm_HQIAX2dOY3ow_9Y79MjYrFBL9WUwz-3wv85DdE_x0/s200/compare.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>It's almost December! Around this time, I start getting worried because the year is almost over and it seems like I haven't done half of all the things I set out to achieve in January. I would hope that every month so far has been productive. Maybe some more than others. Then you think- how am I going to really make this year count before 31st of December? But ultimately, I'm thankful to God for keeping me alive, giving me a purpose, and allowing me to grow older and wiser everyday.<br />
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Have you ever felt that compared with "everyone else" around you, your own circumstances are the worst? Do you have thoughts like "all my mates have achieved this, done that, have this or have that"? I'm now exploring this phenomenum of measuring myself with another person's yard stick. Where does it come from? Is it parents, peer pressure, the society as a whole or just my own unrealistic expectations?<br />
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It's probably a mixture of all four. On one hand, it drives me to want to achieve more and more (sort of like healthy competition) to ensure that I can boast too, but on the other hand, it makes me think "What's the point? That person just had better opportunities than I have". Like when you hear of your classmate in uni who is now a millionaire, or your friend from high school now running her own fashion empire. You are happy for them of course, but you also compare yourself and you end up feeling very <em>small</em>.<br />
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I think it starts when we still are young. You are put in a classroom with 15 or so other 3-year olds. There you are expected to all be at the same level, grow at the same speed and learn at the same pace. If for any reason you don't keep up with the rest of the class, then there's a problem with you. This pattern continues throughout life. You want the latest toys because "everybody has one". You want to wear a certain item of clothing because "that's what all the other kids are wearing". You want to feel like you are similar to everyone. You find yourself constantly looking around and checking to see if you are ahead or behind of your peers. Then you grow up and suddenly you realise that some things are outside your control. Your career is progressing very slowly meanwhile your mates have soared far ahead. Or your mates are getting engaged, married, and launching babies while you are still single. Or your friend has just bought a new flat, while you are still renting or living at home. <b>It all adds up to a perfect recipe for frustration.</b><br />
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But why do we compare? Are we all given the same opportunities? Did God give us the same talents? Do we have the same circumstances? Do we all have the same goals? Do we have the same experiences or backgrounds? No, no, no and no. We don't even have the same genes!<br />
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So I've decided, from now on, I'm not going to compare myself with anyone else. I am me. I am unique. We all have our time and purpose to fulfil on earth. My time and purpose is not dependent on other people. Only God is in full control. And only God will I give the ability to push me forward.<br />
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Have a good week and a blessed month of December!<br />
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PS: It's my sister's birthday today! Happy birthday darling! xxx<br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">Image credit: plmtwine.com</span><div class="blogger-post-footer">Tolulope Popoola: Writer, Blogger, Publisher, Dreamer, Bookworm.
Blog: http://www.onwritingandlife.com
Facebook: http://facebook.com/TolulopePopoola
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TolulopePopoola
Publishing: http://www.accomplishpress.com</div>Favoured Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06799796628809329966noreply@blogger.com19tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8411513974227018754.post-12382915374581440162010-11-05T01:57:00.002+00:002010-11-08T16:30:12.655+00:00Achilles' Heel<div style="text-align: justify;">Hi folks! It's been a minute on this blog. I've been doing a lot of work and writing behind the scenes, updating my <a href="http://journeydowntheaisle.blogspot.com/">JDTA</a> blog, writing short stories for magazines and working on our <a href="http://inmydreamsitwassimpler.blogspot.com/">fiction series blog</a> too, so I've allowed this blog to slide a bit. But rest assured, I'm doing great! Thanks to my friends who checked on me - I appreciate you guys!</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">So what's going on Blogville? I can't believe it's November already! For real, when was it June? Summer is now well and truly over, the days are getting shorter while the nights are getting longer, Christmas adverts are already appearing on TV, and I've had to start taking stock of the happenings of 2010. Soon, we would be making plans to welcome 2011 and then 2012... In everything, I can't complain because I've been experiencing God's blessings and favour throughout the year.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">It's been a busy time for me in the last two months. Apart from writing, I've had my family coming over, been taking driving lessons, and generally moving into a new phase of my life. I've also been catching up on my reading, as I've got so many books on my to-read list, it's unbelievable. But I still can't stop myself from buying more! In the last month, I've read <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Book-Thief-Markus-Zusak/dp/0375842209?ie=UTF8&tag=favosblo-20&link_code=btl&camp=213689&creative=392969" target="_blank">The Book Thief</a><img alt="" border="0" height="1" src="http://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=favosblo-20&l=btl&camp=213689&creative=392969&o=1&a=0375842209" style="border: none !important; margin: 0px !important; padding: 0px !important;" width="1" /> by Markus Zusak (this was quite a strange book, very different from what I would usually pick up, but it was a very good read nonetheless), <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Boy-Next-Door-Novel/dp/031604993X?ie=UTF8&tag=favosblo-20&link_code=btl&camp=213689&creative=392969" target="_blank">The Boy Next Door</a> by Irene Sabatini (I quite enjoyed reading this love story woven around the politics of Zimbabwe), and <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Love-at-Dawn-Lara-Daniels/dp/0557465389?ie=UTF8&tag=favosblo-20&link_code=btl&camp=213689&creative=392969" target="_blank">Love at Dawn</a><img alt="" border="0" height="1" src="http://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=favosblo-20&l=btl&camp=213689&creative=392969&o=1&a=0557465389" style="border: none !important; margin: 0px !important; padding: 0px !important;" width="1" /> by Lara Daniels (a tale of love, forgiveness and redemption which I thoroughly enjoyed reading) and I'm looking forward to a couple more before the end of the year.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">Ever since I saw the movie <i><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Troy-Two-Disc-Full-Screen-Brad/dp/B0002Z0EYA?ie=UTF8&tag=favosblo-20&link_code=btl&camp=213689&creative=392969" target="_blank">Troy</a><img alt="" border="0" height="1" src="http://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=favosblo-20&l=btl&camp=213689&creative=392969&o=1&a=B0002Z0EYA" style="border: none !important; margin: 0px !important; padding: 0px !important;" width="1" /></i>, I've been fascinated with the main characters in the story, especially Achilles. He was the great hero of the Trojan War and apparently when he was a baby his mother dipped him into a river which made him invincible except for his heel. According to Greek mythology, Achilles grew to become a great warrior and no one could stop him until Paris, a prince of Troy managed to shoot an arrow into his heel. Thus the phrase "Achilles heel" came to mean a weakness or flaw that can lead to a person's downfall in spite of his overall strength. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">This story makes me think that we all have a weakness that can potentially lead to our downfall if we don't deal with it. I can think of many great men who have been destroyed by their lack of self-control when it comes to women. Some people have ended up in prison because of their greed for money. Some people have committed atrocious acts because of anger. And the list goes on. It may seem like it's not a big deal, and just overlook a small flaw in ourselves, but we do need to be careful. I know that I have my weaknesses too, and I have to constantly ask God for grace to overcome them. It can be all too easy to let one thing get out of hand, until we lose control and succumb to negative desires.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">If you are struggling with some temptations or something that goes against your principles, please don't ignore it or hope it would go away by itself. You have to take steps to make sure you don't fall. For example, if you know your married boss at work is showing inappropriate interest in you, it would certainly not be wise to go on a dinner date with him. Do what you can to remove yourself from such sticky situations! One little slip of judgement could be all it takes, and before you know it, you are involved in an affair.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">Oh well, that's enough sermonising for now, lol. Do head over to our <a href="http://inmydreamsitwassimpler.blogspot.com/">series blog</a> for some news on the In My Dreams It Was Simpler Story and the latest installment. Yours truly is writing this week and I promise it will be a worthy read! </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">Make sure you have a very relaxing weekend!</div><br />
FG<div class="blogger-post-footer">Tolulope Popoola: Writer, Blogger, Publisher, Dreamer, Bookworm.
Blog: http://www.onwritingandlife.com
Facebook: http://facebook.com/TolulopePopoola
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TolulopePopoola
Publishing: http://www.accomplishpress.com</div>Tolulope Popoolahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04824894132453805811noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8411513974227018754.post-16663406960828802822010-10-03T02:30:00.003+01:002010-10-07T12:02:19.056+01:00University of LifeSometime ago I pondered about this modern world of ours. Something is really wrong. There is a break down of society as a whole. We read of shootings and stabbings daily in the newspapers. We hear of gangs of youths carrying knives and guns to defend themselves with. We hear of marriages breaking up everyday - divorce rates are soaring and people are choosing not to get married anyway. We hear that stress at work is a major killer and cause of many serious diseases. We see the picture of the ideal family unit broken almost beyond repair. We see people sacrificing everything in the pursuit of happiness that just seems to elude them. Why is it so? I think it is mostly because we have placed the emphasis on the wrong things.<br />
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From the moment we are born, we are thrust into a society that places so much importance in education and defines us by success in our careers. How? We'll take the life of this typical child. From the day he is born, his parents bought him the best 'educational toys' that aim to give him a headstart in learning skills. His parents do all they can to enroll him in the best nursery school where he is to learn basic skills in speech, reading and writing. After that, he goes on to primary school where he is taught a wide range of subjects to give him a knowledge base that will be useful in future. Fast forward to three years of secondary school and then he is expected to make certain choices in his subjects that will start to define his future career. By the time he is finished with secondary school, success means achieving a place at university to study a degree. This degree will be his ticket to a life-long career. He may need to continually update his qualifications for example, getting a Masters qualification, taking some examinations etc. Success is measured by his job and how much he earns. Assuming he finished education at 24, he spends the next 40-odd years of his life working 9 - 5, Monday to Friday to earn a living. If the UK government have their way, he would be working until he is in his 70s before he can retire and claim a pension. But is that all?<br />
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Now I think education is a good thing. I think every child on this planet should be given an equal chance to succeed with a certain level of education. But I find it worrying that we place so much importance on just that - education and career. Is there not more to life than acquiring a degree? Would having a brilliant career make everyone's life fulfilled?<br />
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I read something in 'My Daily Bread' a while back. A survey was conducted about what people would want to reflect on in their final moments on this earth. What would they look back on and count as achievements? Strings of degrees? An impressive CV? Hefty bank accounts? List of awards and certificates? No. The main response people gave was they they would want their loved ones around them when they were on their death-bed. Furthermore, the biggest regret expressed wasn't "I wish I had spent more time at work". It was "I wish I had spent more time with my family". Family and loved ones always took priority over education and achievements.<br />
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Now if this is true, how come we still have this dysfunctional world? How come we spend the vast majority of our lives either in education or working endlessly pursuing material wealth? How come you can go to university to study virtually any subject in academics or research but there is no university that teaches us about the real-life challenges we face? You can study to become a Financial Analyst but who teaches you how to cope with the grief of losing of a loved one? You can study to become a doctor but where do you study to become a good husband or wife? I can graduate with a Bcs in Mathematics but where can I get a degree in Good Parenting Skills? Those are the things that really challenge us as individuals and no amount of education can help.<br />
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If I could change the world, I would shake up the current set-up. I would not be happy in a world where the majority of hours in the week, is all but committed to working, working, working. A world where the main driving force is money, money, money. When do we have time to actually live? When do we have time to grow and learn to become better people? Why won't we have a society that is crumbling?<div class="blogger-post-footer">Tolulope Popoola: Writer, Blogger, Publisher, Dreamer, Bookworm.
Blog: http://www.onwritingandlife.com
Facebook: http://facebook.com/TolulopePopoola
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TolulopePopoola
Publishing: http://www.accomplishpress.com</div>Favoured Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06799796628809329966noreply@blogger.com14tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8411513974227018754.post-63966036687295810462010-09-08T23:57:00.002+01:002011-06-13T16:14:15.866+01:00Faith vs Common Sense<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhrEkwMKDJrOkmuW7W8eken2IemQvU0vvGfcRiAqIVKO3J5NFLbH8x_Sxm9Wz5eLfUCxwEm_2mx2oRMT29FbGpGPy0vDFmvAFBH24KE1Is9CvUjGiPjxeUts6o_d3YrPd1PyHD4yq-eODY/s1600/faith-road-sign.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhrEkwMKDJrOkmuW7W8eken2IemQvU0vvGfcRiAqIVKO3J5NFLbH8x_Sxm9Wz5eLfUCxwEm_2mx2oRMT29FbGpGPy0vDFmvAFBH24KE1Is9CvUjGiPjxeUts6o_d3YrPd1PyHD4yq-eODY/s200/faith-road-sign.jpg" width="200" /></a></div><b>"Faith is believing when common sense tells you not to." ~ George Seaton</b><br />
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For a while I've been pondering on faith, and its implications for the way I live my life every day. Sometimes when I'm at a crossroads and I need to make a decision, I often have a dilemma. Should I go with common sense or should I walk by faith? Do I go with my instincts? Should I make a list of pros and cons and use pure common sense to make a decision? Should I weigh all the options and go with the most "logical" conclusion? Should the way forward be the most "reasonable" one?<br />
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However, as a Christian who has decided to make God the CEO of my life, I've sometimes had to step back and wait for a different direction. The bible says:<b> "Faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen".</b> The bible also says <b>"Trust in the LORD with all your heart And do not lean on your own understanding."</b><br />
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There are many examples of God asking His people in the bible to make decisions that totally make no sense. God called Abraham to leave all that he knew, his father's house and go to a strange land. God told Noah to build an ark when there was no sea or river around him. God told Gideon to go to war with only 300 men when they were facing an enemy army of over 100,000 soldiers. Each time, it required true faith to for each of these people to override their common sense and obey God.<br />
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Still, it can be really scary when common sense clashes with what you believe God is telling you to do. If God says: quit your job and become a full-time missionary in some remote village, what immediately comes to mind? Questions and doubts of course. Like: how will I survive without a regular income? What about my career? Will I be safe there without my family and friends around me? Etc.<br />
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Even the strongest amongst us wrestles with doubt sometimes. It's normal, it's natural, it's part of being human. But from my little experience, I'll say that in the end, common sense has its place but faith triumphs over it. As long as your faith is in God and what He has called you to do, you cannot go wrong.<br />
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<ul><li>Common sense relies on your own limited abilities. Faith relies on God's unlimited ability.</li>
<li>Common sense stops when things get rough. Faith keeps going when common sense is exhausted.</li>
<li>Common sense says you should play it safe. Faith challenges us to step beyond our comfort zone</li>
<li>Faith says one failure does not mean the end. Common sense says you should give up if it doesn't work the first time.</li>
<li>Common sense limits you to only what you know. Faith empowers you to stretch your imagination.</li>
</ul><br />
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Thanks for reading!<br />
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FG<div class="blogger-post-footer">Tolulope Popoola: Writer, Blogger, Publisher, Dreamer, Bookworm.
Blog: http://www.onwritingandlife.com
Facebook: http://facebook.com/TolulopePopoola
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TolulopePopoola
Publishing: http://www.accomplishpress.com</div>Tolulope Popoolahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04824894132453805811noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8411513974227018754.post-69705938428166840742010-07-27T22:11:00.001+01:002010-07-27T22:28:26.707+01:00Five Years<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCibNeO6_jECLzH8NMLMtTISdfY2sHPVexGbsIAzSde58CHp9Vhhr4Ab179NkX6sk4C5R6iSXNjJVWVO5_thC9trs9H45GNjGPmXbE8v4orWTRlV55J9u6YHZF3DZ_WuotoAxKZ4g8hAI/s1600/anniversary.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCibNeO6_jECLzH8NMLMtTISdfY2sHPVexGbsIAzSde58CHp9Vhhr4Ab179NkX6sk4C5R6iSXNjJVWVO5_thC9trs9H45GNjGPmXbE8v4orWTRlV55J9u6YHZF3DZ_WuotoAxKZ4g8hAI/s200/anniversary.jpg" width="199" /></a></div>Last weekend, hubby and I celebrated our fifth wedding anniversary. I honestly can't believe it's been five years already since I donned a white dress, walked down the aisle and said my vows. I can also honestly say that it's been the most awesome decision I've ever made.<br />
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Looking back now, I can't imagine how different my life would have been if i hadn't gotten married in 2005. Sometimes I try to visualise myself in a different setting, maybe living in a different place, doing a different job and so on. No matter what, I still choose my life now any day. My life now makes complete sense because God arranged it that way. So I've got a lot of things to thank God for, everyday. Sometimes I'm short of words to express how grateful I am when I think about His blessings towards me.<br />
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Hey so I've been married for just over 1825 days! In practical terms, it probably means I've cooked over 2000 meals and done more than 1000 washing machine loads of laundry. In that time, we've moved house three times and changed cars four times. We've been on nine holidays together, watched more than 300 movies together, laughed over a million and one things together. We've both made career changes, wrestled with our faith sometimes, made mistakes, but come out stronger. We've enjoyed the good days and learned from the rough patches. We've dealt with each other's flaws and learnt to appreciate each other's strengths. It's been a journey of discovery about myself and about him. I'm wiser now, than I was five years ago, and that's a good thing!<br />
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To celebrate, we had a photoshoot - cos looking at our wedding album a few months ago I realised it was so out of date! Then I organised a surprise party for hubby (it was also his birthday) and he fell right into it! lol, he swore to retaliate though, which I don't really mind. It was fun planning the party, making calls and sending texts right under his nose and he didn't suspect a thing! I guess he trusts me! I'm grateful for our friends that came (one of them is a blogger) and kept it a secret from him.<br />
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In everything, I'm grateful to God and so looking forward to the next 5, 10, 15 and more years of happy marriage!<br />
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FG<div class="blogger-post-footer">Tolulope Popoola: Writer, Blogger, Publisher, Dreamer, Bookworm.
Blog: http://www.onwritingandlife.com
Facebook: http://facebook.com/TolulopePopoola
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TolulopePopoola
Publishing: http://www.accomplishpress.com</div>Tolulope Popoolahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04824894132453805811noreply@blogger.com27tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8411513974227018754.post-38922187544774369062010-06-04T03:00:00.000+01:002010-06-04T03:01:07.481+01:00New Month and UpdatesHi everyone! Welcome to the month of June! Sheesh, I can't believe I didn't update this blog for over a month. That's not because I didn't have anything to say, but I've just been so busy! Where do I even start from now? May was quite an eventful month, even though I feel like it flew by and I couldn't slow it down long enough to finish doing all I had planned.<br />
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On a personal note, I'm thankful I had a good month, I have many many reasons to be grateful to God. He remains faithful, the only One in my life that has never and would never let me down. I'm grateful for another year added to my life, and the many joys I have enjoyed. I'm grateful for my family and friends, for my health and for peace of mind. I'm grateful for provision and protection, for God's mercies, favour and guidance. I'm grateful for answered prayers, and even pending ones.<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOZolhhqoGTjIzM4hBoGYSCbRXNtFFehsP7uZkPHUSbITBSDdoGScG7Sw-mqYkJliSgsTUHHACYbShSfdGlzJZrM0B07aSR2GGdpNaCU_HBDF2n1U4g7IiSscHrunO9PsdrOdZ0T0U8-U/s1600/updates.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOZolhhqoGTjIzM4hBoGYSCbRXNtFFehsP7uZkPHUSbITBSDdoGScG7Sw-mqYkJliSgsTUHHACYbShSfdGlzJZrM0B07aSR2GGdpNaCU_HBDF2n1U4g7IiSscHrunO9PsdrOdZ0T0U8-U/s200/updates.jpg" width="135" /></a></div>In other news:<br />
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I've started working on a new novel. My previous WIP manuscript has gone up in smoke. While it was a painful decision to throw it away, I have had time to reflect on it and I reckon, no knowledge is wasted. I've learnt a lot while writing it and I dare say, that my writing has improved. I may return to it much later in the future, but I would have to do so much work to edit it, that I fear it may not be worth the trouble.<br />
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Myself and some of my fellow writers (of the <a href="http://inmydreamsitwassimpler.blogspot.com/"><b><i>In My Dreams It was Simpler</i></b></a> series) were interviewed for The Mantle. It was a fun experience, and we were thrilled to be approached by Shaun Randol, the Senior Editor to do a joint interview. You can read the two parts of the interview by clicking the links below:<br />
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<a href="http://www.mantlethought.org/content/one-story-many-voices-1"><i><b>The Mantle Interview (Part 1)</b></i></a><br />
<a href="http://www.mantlethought.org/content/one-story-many-voices-2"><i><b>The Mantle Interview (Part 2)</b></i></a><br />
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I've got a feature in this month's edition of Reconnect Africa Magazine, also based on the series book. It turned out really interesting, so do check it out here:<br />
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<a href="http://www.reconnectafrica.com/June-2010/african-diaspora/in-my-dreams-it-was-simpler.html"><b><i>Feature on ReConnect Africa</i></b></a><br />
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And finally, our group blog <a href="http://inmydreamsitwassimpler.blogspot.com/"><i><b>In My Dreams It Was Simpler</b></i></a> has been nominated in three categories for the 2010 Nigerian Blog Awards! If you haven't already, head over to the <a href="http://nigerianblogawards.com/group-a-categories/voting-is-now-open-category-a/"><b><i>Nigerian Blog Awards</i></b></a> link right now to vote for us! We are in the <b>Best Group or Collaborative Blog</b>, <b>Best Writing or Book Blog</b>, and the <b>Nigerian Blog of the Year</b> categories. We are up against some tough competition, but it's great that we got recognised for our work! Do pop over there now to cast your vote. For us, of course. LOL<br />
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Have a lovely weekend and a blessed month!<br />
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FG<div class="blogger-post-footer">Tolulope Popoola: Writer, Blogger, Publisher, Dreamer, Bookworm.
Blog: http://www.onwritingandlife.com
Facebook: http://facebook.com/TolulopePopoola
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TolulopePopoola
Publishing: http://www.accomplishpress.com</div>Tolulope Popoolahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04824894132453805811noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8411513974227018754.post-57675460016090728132010-04-30T22:56:00.002+01:002010-05-01T16:18:10.389+01:00Bald Head and My Birthday<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnamv2a8SIn40eZI0xKtO8lDbI3rHn_s-uL8pDvNDcT3-Q-l02JYclh4UZuBgvH4cym1G1cy7fq9l2fwVgYUegG6xA62i_QtWPD_rJpXDAPxs9paGn1y84ljTQJSpNCbeBF_HmOVdSo_o/s1600/Nnenna.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnamv2a8SIn40eZI0xKtO8lDbI3rHn_s-uL8pDvNDcT3-Q-l02JYclh4UZuBgvH4cym1G1cy7fq9l2fwVgYUegG6xA62i_QtWPD_rJpXDAPxs9paGn1y84ljTQJSpNCbeBF_HmOVdSo_o/s320/Nnenna.jpg" width="241" /></a></div>I think I'm going to shave off all my hair and rock a bald head for a while - like Nnena here.<br />
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I've been toying with the idea since last month and I've been 50-50 about it, but after today, I'm more like 90-10 in favour of shaving my hair off. All the stress, required care and work necessary to maintain long, healthy black hair is getting too much. Maybe I'm lazy, but I would rather take convenience over stress any day. I mean, I've practically stopped doing any physical shopping since I could buy things online. You name it, clothes, books, shoes, gifts, gadgets, even my weekly grocery shopping, I get them delivered to my doorstep. The last time I had to go shopping with a friend, I got bored and impatient after twenty minutes. Life is too short - I could be doing better things with my time, instead of trawling the shops, bumping into people who just stop walking randomly, loaded with heavy bags, dealing with long queues at the tills and over-helpful staff in the changing rooms.<br />
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Anyway so what brought this on? This morning, I went to the salon to have my hair put in short, kinky twists, my favourite hairstyle. By the time I left the salon, I was tired, poorer, and grumpy with a sore neck. I'm sure my blood pressure would have gone up a notch or two as well. First of all, the stylist was trying to convince me to have a weave instead. I was like "What? Are you the one that will dictate the style I want to do?". To cut a long story short, we started the hair. We hadn't gone far when we had another row because she tried to run a blazing hot blow-dryer through my hair. Then she stopped my hair halfway and started someone else's. When I had enough I got up and was about to leave, when the manager pleaded with me to be patient. Let's just say it wasn't a pleasant experience and I was so fed-up by the time they finally finished my hair, that I never want to do it again. Well, not for a year or two anyway.<br />
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Okay, rant over. On to more beautiful gist:<br />
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It's the Bank Holiday weekend! And it's my birthday! Yep, that's right - I'm going to be a year older by the time I come back to update this blog. Usually I try to do something to celebrate, but this year I haven't made any plans. We tried to get tickets to see a show in the West End, but we left it too late, and all the good ones were sold out! So I guess it will be a quiet one at home. Hubby is even threatening to use the extra day off to study so I may just sleep through the day. lol<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIfponOl201EBi005Yj6JW2LkdMWOEBk-MkOXhBIt6S4E8wwMl5Dn2pMVT6w5hvTEhOmiT1TmagxmNDW2pOUUAms2zZ54phmIpOr5hkAn1lTPQyxK67ICjk1v6TERb8lO8bbcjeRRpML8/s1600/cake.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIfponOl201EBi005Yj6JW2LkdMWOEBk-MkOXhBIt6S4E8wwMl5Dn2pMVT6w5hvTEhOmiT1TmagxmNDW2pOUUAms2zZ54phmIpOr5hkAn1lTPQyxK67ICjk1v6TERb8lO8bbcjeRRpML8/s200/cake.jpg" width="165" /></a></div>However, if anyone wants to throw me a surprise party or send me presents or buy me a birthday cake, then I won't say no. You will be more than welcome!<br />
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Have a great weekend blogville!<br />
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PS: Before you go, check out our latest installment on the series blog <b><a href="http://inmydreamsitwassimpler.blogspot.com/">HERE</a></b><br />
<br />
And check out my poem, published on Femme Lounge <b><a href="http://www.femmelounge.org/?p=1112">HERE</a></b><br />
<b><br />
</b><br />
<b>xxx</b><div class="blogger-post-footer">Tolulope Popoola: Writer, Blogger, Publisher, Dreamer, Bookworm.
Blog: http://www.onwritingandlife.com
Facebook: http://facebook.com/TolulopePopoola
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TolulopePopoola
Publishing: http://www.accomplishpress.com</div>Tolulope Popoolahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04824894132453805811noreply@blogger.com21tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8411513974227018754.post-3105643764413895742010-04-19T07:37:00.002+01:002010-04-26T10:27:06.975+01:00Social Issues: Domestic Staff<div style="text-align: justify;">If you follow TTEC on Solomosydelle's blog, you may have come across some of the recent posts on "<a href="http://www.solomonsydelle.com/2010/04/tttec-of-househelps-abuse-3.html">Househelps and Sexual Abuse</a>" which have been featured lately. I found those posts quite worrying, and they got me thinking about the way the vast majority of middle and upper class Nigerians treat their domestic staff - p<span class="apple-style-span">eople like housemaids, gatemen,/security men, drivers, gardeners and so on.</span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span lang="EN-GB" style="color: black; font-family: Georgia;"> </span></span> The other day, I was discussing the issue with some friends and we all agreed that, in general, they were treated in an appalling way. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">From what I've observed, they are treated like second-class citizens in the homes where they work. They often don't share the same living quarters with the rest of the family. Or they are given the worst spaces possible. They use a different set of utensils to eat, for some reason. They are given cast-offs of the children's clothes to wear. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">Then they are spoken to in awful ways. Sometimes I would visit a friend and she would be speaking with me nicely and politely, and then turn around to use a harsh and intimidating tone on her housemaid, and call her abusive names. I don't understand it. Sure you can use a stern tone when you are giving instructions to an employee but is there a need for the constant stream of abuse? Would any of us take that kind of attitude from our managers at the office?</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">Which brings me to my next point. Domestic staff have little or no employment rights. They don't have regular working hours, due to the nature of their work. But then they also don't have any benefits. They don't have holidays, they don't get days off, they don't have anything called a social life. They don't get sick days off or sick pay. Sometimes they don't go to school and can't learn any skill while they are working for their masters. I'm sure none of us professional ladies would ever imagine working for a company that didn't give us any time off or holidays, or allow us any social life. We would protest, but we give the same treatment to our own employees. I have even heard women complaining bitterly when it's Christmas time, and their maid wants to take a couple of weeks off to go and visit her family. It's like, she's not human right? She doesn't need time off to go and see her family. Never mind that madam has taken time off from her own job so that she can enjoy her own Christmas holiday.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">Furthermore, the physical violence towards them is just... I don't know. Women who won't raise a hand to strike their own children seem to see no qualms in beating their maids to a pulp at the slightest offence. For some reason, the maid always deserves a beating whenever she makes a mistakes, whereas their children do worse things, but they don't get beaten. Why? What makes it different? Would any of us tolerate physical abuse at work? Why do we think it is okay to hit our domestic staff?</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">The funny thing is that these mistreatments are not limited to any type of woman. I have witnessed women from all spheres of life mistreating their domestic staff. Even women who should know better, like pastor's wives, lawyers or human right's activists. We can speak out against so many injustices in the world, but for some reason, we seem to turn a blind eye to the ones we do right under our nose. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">We can argue that we can't trust them, they are rogues, thieves and what not. But for the amount of money they are paid, and the useful service they provide to us, most of our domestic staff don't get treated well. So of course, they don't have much of an incentive to behave properly. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">Has anyone tried to put themselves in their maid's shoes? You are taken away from your family and sent to the city to work for a strange family. You could be scared, lonely and homesick, but you have to put all those emotions aside and get on with it. Then you have to endure working from sunrise to sunset every single day of the week. If you are really lucky you will end up working for a nice family that will treat you well. But the majority are treated harshly by everyone in the family - from the madam, to the <i>oga</i>, to the children. And you dare not complain. In fact, who will you complain to? Who will believe you, if you say your madam is mistreating you, or your <i>oga</i> is making sexual advances towards you? The best you can do is to run away. But where does that leave you? Out of a job, broke and lost in a big city.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">I hope we can all start making some small changes to the way we treat our maids. It may just be a small change we make everyday, but it would make a whole world of difference to someone. I would like to imagine a world where housemaids can point to the time they spent with their madams and say that those years were one of the best times of their lives.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">Food for thought.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">Anyways, have a great week ahead!</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">FG</div><div class="blogger-post-footer">Tolulope Popoola: Writer, Blogger, Publisher, Dreamer, Bookworm.
Blog: http://www.onwritingandlife.com
Facebook: http://facebook.com/TolulopePopoola
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TolulopePopoola
Publishing: http://www.accomplishpress.com</div>Favoured Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06799796628809329966noreply@blogger.com14tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8411513974227018754.post-32599375063287610242010-04-02T01:27:00.002+01:002010-04-02T01:30:03.447+01:00Happy Easter<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUT8P7nElECCIVjmwS_CSzDL9DXMlkhSr43Cr5ttoGRxv0pg6hk1K5XdBNie95qfu3dYdxPnoSCEPToMV3KgTniLXvAu5OiW4B7Tt-xwBZ9G3AqDGDsAp7yvI2MwQVgSp3CghOfFlbgy8/s1600/happy-easter.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUT8P7nElECCIVjmwS_CSzDL9DXMlkhSr43Cr5ttoGRxv0pg6hk1K5XdBNie95qfu3dYdxPnoSCEPToMV3KgTniLXvAu5OiW4B7Tt-xwBZ9G3AqDGDsAp7yvI2MwQVgSp3CghOfFlbgy8/s200/happy-easter.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>Happy new month! I hope you had a good month in March, and are looking forward to bigger and better things in April. I honestly don't know where the time went! It was like I blinked and March flew past me. Somebody please tell April to slow down and not fly by so fast... by the way, did anyone get sucked into an April Fool's prank?<br />
<div><br />
</div><div>This week, I've learnt to be thankful for electricity. Last Monday, there was a power cut in our area that lasted for over 14 hours. It was so unusual for that to happen, we didn't have any back-up in the house! Our place operates on electricity so I couldn't cook, do the laundry, or heat the house. We had to go and get a torch light and batteries in the evening. It was such a relief when the power came back on!</div><div><br />
</div><div>I've finished reading <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Love-Paradise-Lara-Daniels/dp/0615305660?ie=UTF8&tag=favosblo-20&link_code=btl&camp=213689&creative=392969" target="_blank"><b>Love in Paradise</b></a><b><img alt="" border="0" height="1" src="http://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=favosblo-20&l=btl&camp=213689&creative=392969&o=1&a=0615305660" style="border: none !important; margin: 0px !important; padding: 0px !important;" width="1" /></b> by Lara Daniels, <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Egg-Larva-Pupa-Woman-Ogo-Akubue-Ogbata/dp/0956014267?ie=UTF8&tag=favosblo-20&link_code=btl&camp=213689&creative=392969" target="_blank"><b>Egg-Larva-Pupa-Woman</b></a><b><img alt="" border="0" height="1" src="http://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=favosblo-20&l=btl&camp=213689&creative=392969&o=1&a=0956014267" style="border: none !important; margin: 0px !important; padding: 0px !important;" width="1" /></b> by Ogo Akubue-Ogbata (which the writers both kindly sent to me) and <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Dependence-Sarah-Ladipo-Manyika/dp/1906558043?ie=UTF8&tag=favosblo-20&link_code=btl&camp=213689&creative=392969" target="_blank"><b>In Dependence</b></a><b><img alt="" border="0" height="1" src="http://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=favosblo-20&l=btl&camp=213689&creative=392969&o=1&a=1906558043" style="border: none !important; margin: 0px !important; padding: 0px !important;" width="1" /></b> by Sarah Ladipo Manyika (which broke my heart). I'm now reading <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Kite-Runner-Khaled-Hosseini/dp/1594480001?ie=UTF8&tag=favosblo-20&link_code=btl&camp=213689&creative=392969" target="_blank"><b>The Kite Runner</b></a><b><img alt="" border="0" height="1" src="http://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=favosblo-20&l=btl&camp=213689&creative=392969&o=1&a=1594480001" style="border: none !important; margin: 0px !important; padding: 0px !important;" width="1" /> </b>by Khaled Hosseini. Loving them all, and I promise to review them later. </div><div><br />
</div><div>The Easter weekend is upon us! I'm looking forward to a relaxing time with hubby, we might visit a couple of family and friends, generally eat more than usual, and reflect on the reason why we celebrate the season. I'm thankful that Jesus came to earth to die for us, and I'm so glad that He accomplished His mission on earth, and He redeemed us. I've been very good so far, I haven't indulged in Easter eggs (yet). But we'll see!<br />
<br />
Before you go:<br />
<br />
Read about our Amazon Book Launch, courtesy of <a href="http://bookaholicblog.blogspot.com/2010/03/amazon-book-launch-of-in-my-dreams-it.html"><b>The Bookaholic</b></a>. And if you need convincing, check out an excerpt of our book <a href="http://www.amazon.com/My-Dreams-Was-Simpler/dp/1445254204?ie=UTF8&tag=favosblo-20&link_code=btl&camp=213689&creative=392969" target="_blank"><b>In My Dreams It Was Simpler</b></a><b><img alt="" border="0" height="1" src="http://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=favosblo-20&l=btl&camp=213689&creative=392969&o=1&a=1445254204" style="border: none !important; margin: 0px !important; padding: 0px !important;" width="1" /></b> on The New Black Magazine <a href="http://www.thenewblackmagazine.com/view.aspx?index=2273"><b>HERE</b></a><br />
<br />
Don't forget to check out our blog tomorrow for a new installment - right <a href="http://inmydreamsitwassimpler.blogspot.com/"><b>HERE</b></a>, make sure you don't miss it for anything.<br />
<br />
Wish you all a lovely Easter weekend!<br />
<br />
FG<br />
<br />
</div><div class="blogger-post-footer">Tolulope Popoola: Writer, Blogger, Publisher, Dreamer, Bookworm.
Blog: http://www.onwritingandlife.com
Facebook: http://facebook.com/TolulopePopoola
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TolulopePopoola
Publishing: http://www.accomplishpress.com</div>Tolulope Popoolahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04824894132453805811noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8411513974227018754.post-25476440781947469342010-03-18T19:24:00.004+00:002010-03-18T19:43:35.063+00:00Books on My Desk<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjx_G5hXqbNVO5nWmxAIcfzm8PBV09jzuTzqSL9Q_tSc1tuO8oTilrUTAFQDxOGEFT0tm5LbxY9rxomrX94HTWjpj6YqFx5SH2nWL43PtRJM-yA_EAXYXD7eYRctGQxuIls8kuSqz0Vay0/s1600-h/sixbooks.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjx_G5hXqbNVO5nWmxAIcfzm8PBV09jzuTzqSL9Q_tSc1tuO8oTilrUTAFQDxOGEFT0tm5LbxY9rxomrX94HTWjpj6YqFx5SH2nWL43PtRJM-yA_EAXYXD7eYRctGQxuIls8kuSqz0Vay0/s400/sixbooks.JPG" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5450057599402581010" /></a>My books arrived from Amazon! So I've now got six books on my desk to devour. I've already started reading "In Dependence" by Sarah Ladipo Manyika. I might do a review of it when I'm done.<div><br /></div><div>Apart from reading, I've been getting back into the swing of writing again. I've had to abandon my book manuscript for now. I hope to start working on another one very soon. Will keep you all posted.</div><div><br /></div><div>And finally: I want to apologise to you guys for the closure of our<b> "</b><a href="http://inmydreamsitwassimpler.blogspot.com/"><b>In My Dreams It Was Simpler</b></a><b>"</b> series blog. One of our writers was indisposed, and we were also making some changes to the story. Thanks for being patient with us! The blog has reopened now, and the series would be updated tomorrow so do check it out!</div><div><br /></div><div>Have a lovely weekend ahead!</div><div><br /></div><div>FG</div><div class="blogger-post-footer">Tolulope Popoola: Writer, Blogger, Publisher, Dreamer, Bookworm.
Blog: http://www.onwritingandlife.com
Facebook: http://facebook.com/TolulopePopoola
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TolulopePopoola
Publishing: http://www.accomplishpress.com</div>Tolulope Popoolahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04824894132453805811noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8411513974227018754.post-73223240952871315312010-03-03T11:03:00.005+00:002010-04-02T01:38:40.028+01:00Books Books Books!This might sound kinda sad, but I'm so excited because I've just bought some books! Lol, I love reading, and now that I'm a writer it's become part of my job to read. My book shelf is now groaning under the weight of stuff, but that won't make me stop buying books! I've been eyeing so many books for a while, my Amazon wish-list has been calling my name, so I just decided to go ahead and treat myself this month. <br />
<div><br />
</div><div>I bought:<br />
<div><br />
</div><div><a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/Blonde-Roots-Bernardine-Evaristo/dp/0241143853"><b></b></a><b><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Blonde-Roots-Bernardine-Evaristo/dp/B002GJU20G?ie=UTF8&tag=widgetsamazon-20&link_code=btl&camp=213689&creative=392969" target="_blank">Blonde Roots</a><img alt="" border="0" height="1" src="http://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=widgetsamazon-20&l=btl&camp=213689&creative=392969&o=1&a=B002GJU20G" style="border: none !important; margin: 0px !important; padding: 0px !important;" width="1" /></b> by Bernardine Evaristo<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/Black-Sisters-Street-Chika-Unigwe/dp/0224085301/"><b>On Black Sisters' Street</b></a> by Chika Unigwe<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Do-Not-Come-You-Chance/dp/1401323111?ie=UTF8&tag=widgetsamazon-20&link_code=btl&camp=213689&creative=392969" target="_blank"><b>I Do Not Come to You by Chance</b></a><b><img alt="" border="0" height="1" src="http://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=widgetsamazon-20&l=btl&camp=213689&creative=392969&o=1&a=1401323111" style="border: none !important; margin: 0px !important; padding: 0px !important;" width="1" /></b> by Adaobi Tricia Nwaubani<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Kite-Runner-Khaled-Hosseini/dp/1594480001?ie=UTF8&tag=widgetsamazon-20&link_code=btl&camp=213689&creative=392969" target="_blank"><b>The Kite Runner</b></a><b><img alt="" border="0" height="1" src="http://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=widgetsamazon-20&l=btl&camp=213689&creative=392969&o=1&a=1594480001" style="border: none !important; margin: 0px !important; padding: 0px !important;" width="1" /> </b>by Khaled Hosseini<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Dependence-Sarah-Ladipo-Manyika/dp/1906558043?ie=UTF8&tag=widgetsamazon-20&link_code=btl&camp=213689&creative=392969" target="_blank"><b>In Dependence</b></a><b><img alt="" border="0" height="1" src="http://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=widgetsamazon-20&l=btl&camp=213689&creative=392969&o=1&a=1906558043" style="border: none !important; margin: 0px !important; padding: 0px !important;" width="1" /></b> by Sarah Ladipo Manyika<br />
<br />
And finally: <a href="http://www.amazon.com/My-Dreams-Was-Simpler/dp/1445254204?ie=UTF8&tag=widgetsamazon-20&link_code=btl&camp=213689&creative=392969" target="_blank"><b>In My Dreams It Was Simpler</b></a><b><img alt="" border="0" height="1" src="http://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=widgetsamazon-20&l=btl&camp=213689&creative=392969&o=1&a=1445254204" style="border: none !important; margin: 0px !important; padding: 0px !important;" width="1" /></b></div><div><br />
(Yep, I bought a copy of our own book! It's for research purposes, lol)</div><div><br />
</div><div>I can't wait for all of them to arrive in the post! I'm eager to bury my head in crisp pages of literature... transporting me to places far away... introducing me to new people... bliss...</div><div><br />
</div><div>I think I'm sorted for the next month or so, but knowing me, I might just buy a few more sooner!</div><div><br />
</div><div>PS: Check out my interview on <a href="http://bookaholicblog.blogspot.com/2010/02/writers-are-professional-eavesdroppers.html"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">The Bookaholic Blog!</span></b></a> (better late than never)</div><div><br />
</div><div>Enjoy the rest of your week!</div><div><br />
</div><div>FG</div><div><br />
</div><div><br />
</div></div><div class="blogger-post-footer">Tolulope Popoola: Writer, Blogger, Publisher, Dreamer, Bookworm.
Blog: http://www.onwritingandlife.com
Facebook: http://facebook.com/TolulopePopoola
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TolulopePopoola
Publishing: http://www.accomplishpress.com</div>Favoured Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06799796628809329966noreply@blogger.com15tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8411513974227018754.post-14209229529522274942010-02-25T16:30:00.004+00:002010-02-26T23:50:59.404+00:00I'm Human<div style="text-align: center;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:large;">I'm Human</span></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>If you pinch me, I will react</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>If you annoy me, I will get angry</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>If you hurt me, I will cry</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>If you cut me, I will bleed</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>After all, I'm only human.</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><br /></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>I try to be a better person everyday</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>Sometimes it's easy, sometimes it's hard</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>Sometimes I get it right</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>Sometimes I get it wrong</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>But it's okay because,</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>After all, I'm only human</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><br /></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>I make mistakes, I have my flaws</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>I'm not perfect, I'm not pristine</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>I'm not a robot or a machine</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>I have emotions that I express</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>And that's perfectly fine,</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>Because I'm only human</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><br /></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>I'm not an angel, I'm not God</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>I get tired and irritable</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>I have moments of strengths</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>But also moments of weakness</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>I cannot see the future</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>I cannot promise not to fail</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>After all, I'm only human</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><br /></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>I will fall, but I will rise</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>I will do my best once again</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>I will admit when I'm wrong</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>I will say sorry when I offend</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>But this I know for sure</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>I am only human</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><br /></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">(c) FG</div><div class="blogger-post-footer">Tolulope Popoola: Writer, Blogger, Publisher, Dreamer, Bookworm.
Blog: http://www.onwritingandlife.com
Facebook: http://facebook.com/TolulopePopoola
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TolulopePopoola
Publishing: http://www.accomplishpress.com</div>Favoured Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06799796628809329966noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8411513974227018754.post-30305962334793236162010-02-18T17:47:00.008+00:002010-02-25T16:57:32.101+00:00I Hear VoicesNo, I'm not mad.<div><br /></div><div>When I got the <a href="http://favouredgirl.blogspot.com/2009/12/myfirstrejectionletter.html">rejection letter</a> from the publisher I submitted my novel to last year, I decided to put the manuscript away for a while so that I could get some distance and hopefully clarity on it. I haven't looked at the work since December. Now I'm hearing my characters whispering to me, asking me why I abandoned them for so long. They want me to come and clear up the twists I've left in their lives. One of my protagonists especially, is asking for a slight change in his life. I'm considering it.</div><div><br /></div><div>Weird, huh? Most fiction writers would know what I'm talking about. It's funny having your own made-up characters come alive and start taking over your sub-conscious. Weird and a bit scary. Anyhow, I love my job, so I'm not complaining. I just wish they would let me do it on my own terms... okay, okay, I've got to go and finish re-writing that chapter...</div><div><br /></div><div>Take care folks!</div><div><br /></div><div>PS: Before you go, check out my interview on <a href="http://femmelounge.org/?p=685"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:large;">Femme Lounge</span></b></a></div><div><br /></div><div>PPS: Our <b><a href="http://inmydreamsitwassimpler.blogspot.com/"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:large;">series blog</span></a></b> will be updated tomorrow! Make sure you check it out!</div><div><br /></div><div>xx</div><div class="blogger-post-footer">Tolulope Popoola: Writer, Blogger, Publisher, Dreamer, Bookworm.
Blog: http://www.onwritingandlife.com
Facebook: http://facebook.com/TolulopePopoola
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TolulopePopoola
Publishing: http://www.accomplishpress.com</div>Favoured Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06799796628809329966noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8411513974227018754.post-11872257994251570222010-02-13T01:30:00.001+00:002010-02-13T05:04:53.580+00:00Love Poem<div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">My Far Away Love</span></b></span></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Every morning starts beautifully</span></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">with the sound of your sweet voice from a phone call.</span></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">It's second best to actually embracing you in my arms,</span></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">under the covers that protect us from the chill that lies outside.</span></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Your melodic wake-up laughter over the phone is second best</span></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">to the overwhelming smile I see in the morning,</span></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">when I hold you in my arms</span></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">after having spent another wonderful night with you.</span></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Your "I Love You"s over the phone</span></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">always make me smile and hold the phone tighter,</span></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">second best to looking into your eyes with those words,</span></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">and being able to deeply kiss you afterwards,</span></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">sending a chilling warmth throughout our bodies.</span></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">But with you... you are my #1.</span></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">The closest person in the world to me.</span></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">With you, there is no second best.</span></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">There is no one close to even being "second" or "best".</span></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">I hold you, alone, in the most intimate place in my heart.</span></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">It's a place where I can feel you, still close, when you're far away.</span></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Where I can close my eyes, and hear your voice,</span></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">listen to your laugh, and feel your "I Love You"s.</span></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">So please, keep calling me in the morning.</span></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Cause second to your kisses,</span></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">theres no better alarm clock than your personalized ring.</span></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">No better way to begin the day than with you.</span></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">- Patrick Flores -</span></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><br /></i></div><div style="text-align: left;">It's Valentine's weekend, but my val is miles away and this poem expresses how I feel (I'm no poet, so I didn't write it!). I'm missing him and I can't wait for him to come back home. Happy Valentine's Day to all the couples out there, do something special, but remember to keep your love alive every single day!</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">FG</div><div class="blogger-post-footer">Tolulope Popoola: Writer, Blogger, Publisher, Dreamer, Bookworm.
Blog: http://www.onwritingandlife.com
Facebook: http://facebook.com/TolulopePopoola
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TolulopePopoola
Publishing: http://www.accomplishpress.com</div>Favoured Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06799796628809329966noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8411513974227018754.post-13984408787630147672010-01-28T13:57:00.000+00:002010-01-28T13:59:43.832+00:00Imagine Me<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/jL6vw5xI0Bg&hl=en_US&fs=1&"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/jL6vw5xI0Bg&hl=en_US&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br /><div style="text-align: justify;">I woke up and this Kirk Franklin song was playing over and over in my mind. It got me thinking about the time in my life when I was very timid, shy and insecure person, struggling with low self esteem. I remember those feelings of "not being good enough", "not being pretty enough" and so on clearly. I have vowed that the one thing I will make sure I do when I have children of my own is to instill healthy self-esteem and self-confidence into them from a young age.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: justify;">If there is anyone who has never had to deal with low self esteem, there are no words to accurately describe the feelings. It's like a huge cloud hanging over you, darkening everything in your mind. It's like a voice whispering in your head constantly - saying that you are not important, you don't matter, you will never be good enough, you can't do anything good, so why bother? It's the critic in your mind that measures you against everyone else and tells you that you fall far short. It's not believing in yourself or your own talents and abilities. It's like a hopeless despair that you don't deserve anything good, so even when good things happen to you, you are questioning them or thinking they cannot last. It's blaming yourself for everything that goes wrong in your life. It's hating yourself and wishing you could be someone else - anyone just as long as it's not you. It's looking up to someone else to define who are and what you can be. It's settling for less because you don't believe you deserve more. It's not knowing your value and worth.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXXTtEcFHrPcWWUjTPP2q1tHtF_b8PCRdhbKxY4aocr1rhDakNWS5uayZvMJ0uXUV8BzULShkjs8sijT_zs30DnodFPKL6zLpWX9HDihNm_SNZEmtlgh_Q33yj0yZNL5zKmno7f3xU4nri/s1600-h/sad+girl.jpeg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 190px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXXTtEcFHrPcWWUjTPP2q1tHtF_b8PCRdhbKxY4aocr1rhDakNWS5uayZvMJ0uXUV8BzULShkjs8sijT_zs30DnodFPKL6zLpWX9HDihNm_SNZEmtlgh_Q33yj0yZNL5zKmno7f3xU4nri/s200/sad+girl.jpeg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5431787857272290514" /></a><br /></div><div style="text-align: justify;">Need I go on? It's awful, awful awful, and I know this because I went through it. And my heart goes out to anyone who is struggling with these issues. A lot of problems we face in our lives and relationships can be traced to these issues. Why do some women stay with abusive partners? Because they don't think they deserve better. Why do some people give up on their dreams? Because they don't believe they have what it takes to succeed. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: justify;">I can't but be very thankful to God everyday for bringing me out of that twisted way of thinking about myself. Every time I remember, I say "Thank You God because I am not who I used to be some years ago". It wasn't easy but I am sooooo glad that I have gotten over that negative way of thinking about myself - who I am, whose I am and what I am capable of. And I could only have changed my mindset with God's Word and God's help. I have blogged about this in an older post <a href="http://journeydowntheaisle.blogspot.com/2007/01/positive-changes-2.html">here</a> but I just felt like someone needed to read this today.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: justify;">God's word says that He is our Father. He knew you before you we were born. You are a unique individual, created in God's image and likeness. He formed you in your mother's womb. He saw you and declared that you are <i>very good</i>. He is with you every single day. His thoughts towards you are thoughts of good, not of evil. He loves you with an unconditional love that nothing can take away. He loves you so much that He sent His son to die for you because - guess what? You are worth it! You are so valuable to God that even the hairs on your head are numbered. He has invested His time, gifts and talents in you, so you don't need to compare yourself with anyone else. He has kept you and preserved your life thus far, and He has great plans for you.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwOFE7HnCInMKck4SYcxoQAFrZFsnPR-QxG170NMhTijG9CU62zStobFZaZ9XOgd0rntonRVNx9mZ2v6hJpHfaktI-Ob48W0x3vx346FEygJWL4QlWYkvpfbARyh6lVruZCOxUBmJk-jsP/s1600-h/happygirl.JPG"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwOFE7HnCInMKck4SYcxoQAFrZFsnPR-QxG170NMhTijG9CU62zStobFZaZ9XOgd0rntonRVNx9mZ2v6hJpHfaktI-Ob48W0x3vx346FEygJWL4QlWYkvpfbARyh6lVruZCOxUBmJk-jsP/s200/happygirl.JPG" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5431788453084019890" /></a><br /></div><div style="text-align: justify;">The voice telling you negative things about yourself is the enemy. You can choose not to believe it. Instead fill your mind with the positive words of love and affirmation that God has spoken concerning you. With time, you will start to believe in what God has said about you. Don't let low self-esteem hold you down any longer. Start believing in yourself and your worth!</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: justify;">Be blessed!</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: justify;">FG</div><div class="blogger-post-footer">Tolulope Popoola: Writer, Blogger, Publisher, Dreamer, Bookworm.
Blog: http://www.onwritingandlife.com
Facebook: http://facebook.com/TolulopePopoola
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TolulopePopoola
Publishing: http://www.accomplishpress.com</div>Favoured Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06799796628809329966noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8411513974227018754.post-59272223790803980942010-01-14T18:12:00.000+00:002010-01-27T20:38:16.638+00:00Book Launch, Interview and the WeatherHey peeps! It's only the second week of the year and already so much is going on. I've been buried under a load of work and stuff, but also snowed in because of the cold snap the UK has been experiencing in the last two weeks. I find the UK media response to the snow quite amusing. It has been frontpage and headline news for days. They have dedicated so much airtime to covering every single tiny detail of "the big freeze". You would think there are other more important issues to talk about. You would expect that they know it is winter and it snows in winter, so they should just get on with it. But for some reason, the British make a big deal out of it, and it's almost as if the whole country grinds to a halt. Schools close, offices close, the trains don't work, airports close, flights are grounded, the postman doesn't go out, people panic-buy food, etc etc.<div><br /><div>For me, it has been fun to look out of my window every day and see the snow. I've only been out in it twice, and I didn't enjoy it at all. I don't like the cold. So while I thank God for snow, I also thank God for the safety and comfort of a warm house. Here's a pic I took of my neighbour's garden:</div><div><br /></div><div><img src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-3JXdS13zsuIWHBOT9RK-C96ZG8P4JYiND-cmXbdQ4fGN8zq9LEXOjR4Mar7nNSr_nkDlHUW-tHoXTuAjFqOI1NknlB4HXD2FrzhlCQUZGZkXDkO_AmT6R8cVo0JLZTfxsaYi4cheqBTg/s320/DSC02646.JPG" style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5426663159483418642" /></div><div><br /><div><div><br /></div><div>Recently I've been following the news on TV and online about the Haiti earthquake. It's so sad to hear about so many lives lost, people in desperate situations, without food or shelter. If you are able to donate please go to <a href="http://www.dec.org.uk/">Disaster Emergency Committee</a> or <a href="http://www.worldvision.org.uk/">World Vision</a> and give something to help the victims of this natural disaster.</div><div><br /></div><div>In other news - We are launching our blog series book tomorrow! We've compiled the story into a book, which I assure you is a really great read. It's available both in paperback and as an ebook, so you can choose whichever format works for you. We would really appreciate your support, so pop over <a href="http://stores.lulu.com/store.php?fAcctID=28569044">HERE</a> to get your copy! <b>The first ten people to buy a copy tomorrow will get a nice discount. </b>I got my proof copy some days ago and I had fun reading and admiring it. I couldn't believe it was actually <i><b>real</b></i>:</div><div><br /></div><div><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbzJs0nV5M9BSbJeBxv2LHnNl-EGYOfZx8fc_dbNPFQgqvLkn53t0GLNoBfO_fdM2Tlof2dnWQCSk5L5ZsMPM5zL2yynuRRXXTsKwg1d3f7A17uSBjbv7q4pjyFDreTvPeTxKbbWgGhl_l/s1600-h/DSC02651.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbzJs0nV5M9BSbJeBxv2LHnNl-EGYOfZx8fc_dbNPFQgqvLkn53t0GLNoBfO_fdM2Tlof2dnWQCSk5L5ZsMPM5zL2yynuRRXXTsKwg1d3f7A17uSBjbv7q4pjyFDreTvPeTxKbbWgGhl_l/s320/DSC02651.JPG" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5426668099052219346" /></a><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div>I've also got an interview (my first!) with <a href="http://belindaotas.com/?p=700">Belinda Otas</a> - check it out! I guess I have now completely removed the mask of anonymity. <a href="http://life-nolimit.blogspot.com/">Ms NoLimit</a> said I should not not be shy, so there you go! If you see me on the tube, come and say hi!</div><div><br /></div><div>Enjoy the weekend ahead! xx</div></div></div></div></div><div class="blogger-post-footer">Tolulope Popoola: Writer, Blogger, Publisher, Dreamer, Bookworm.
Blog: http://www.onwritingandlife.com
Facebook: http://facebook.com/TolulopePopoola
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TolulopePopoola
Publishing: http://www.accomplishpress.com</div>Favoured Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06799796628809329966noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8411513974227018754.post-39279960748590242332010-01-07T23:30:00.000+00:002010-01-27T20:38:16.641+00:00Week OneJust checking in to say:<div><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>Happy New Year!</b></div><div><br /></div><div>I'm planning, writing and working on many things at the moment, but all will be revealed soon. Got to get cracking on those goals for the new year. Time doesn't wait - can you believe on week in 2010 is gone already!</div><div><br /></div><div>Wish everyone a wonderful year 2010! May all your dreams come true.</div><div class="blogger-post-footer">Tolulope Popoola: Writer, Blogger, Publisher, Dreamer, Bookworm.
Blog: http://www.onwritingandlife.com
Facebook: http://facebook.com/TolulopePopoola
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TolulopePopoola
Publishing: http://www.accomplishpress.com</div>Favoured Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06799796628809329966noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8411513974227018754.post-503576074557880852009-12-31T19:04:00.000+00:002010-01-27T20:38:16.642+00:00Thankful for 2009<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIwgKzengj5N0dq0k812bIgkc4GQHHRLIkTOYHyYFOjvqP3ujn55GKdbmxc63ZbFfbMKIbrMGBEgLT4_6bCtAiF2Iv0byscXts8Yygw5XXpe0uAv9XiAsjXGm0RQZ42X-IOYz3VdHJ0m0L/s1600-h/happy_new_year.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 214px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIwgKzengj5N0dq0k812bIgkc4GQHHRLIkTOYHyYFOjvqP3ujn55GKdbmxc63ZbFfbMKIbrMGBEgLT4_6bCtAiF2Iv0byscXts8Yygw5XXpe0uAv9XiAsjXGm0RQZ42X-IOYz3VdHJ0m0L/s320/happy_new_year.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5421479730620305970" /></a><div>Wow, 2009 is almost over! Did the year fly by quickly or what? Can anyone believe that all the hype about entering the new millennium was actually TEN years ago? Soon it will be 2010 and another decade will begin. Time flies, they say, and it seems like it is spinning even faster nowadays.</div><div><br /></div>This time last year I was looking forward to the year 2009 with hope and expectations. I had a long list of hopes , dreams and ambitions. I had a list of prayer requests and petitions that I placed before God to help me achieve by the end of the year. Now it's the last day of the year, and I am really grateful to God. Nope, I didn't get everything on my wish-list. But I have gained so many wonderful things in this past year, and I have received so many blessings from God, that I cannot but be grateful.<div><br /></div><div><b>I'm thankful to God for my blessings. I have been overwhelmed many times when I think about how good God has been to me. I can't list them all but I can mention a few:</b></div><div><br /></div><div>I'm thankful for my family: mum, dad, sisters, aunts, uncles, cousins, in-laws, etc. Sure, once in a while somebody gets on my nerves but I know I love them, and I cannot do without them.</div><div><br /></div><div>I'm thankful for the simple joys of peaceful sleep. I have slept and woken up everyday in the last 365 days.</div><div><br /></div><div>I'm thankful to God for meeting all my needs. I never had to go hungry or beg for anything in 2009.</div><div><br /></div><div>I'm thankful for the good times that I enjoyed, and the not-so-good times where God was my strength and hope.</div><div><br /></div><div>I'm thankful for laughter and fun in my life. There are too many sad and lonely people in the world today.</div><div><br /></div><div>I'm thankful to God for adding another year to my life. I celebrated a birthday in perfect health, surrounded by good friends and family.</div><div><br /></div><div>I'm thankful to God for the many wonderful new friends I made this year. Especially my fellow bloggers who have become my friends and sisters. <a href="http://alotedbabe.blogspot.com/">Aloted</a>, <a href="http://amarasviewonstuff.blogspot.com/">Believer</a>, <a href="http://writefreak.blogspot.com/">Writefreak</a>, <a href="http://life-nolimit.blogspot.com/">Nolimit</a>, <a href="http://diamondhawk.blogspot.com/">Diamond Hawk</a>, <a href="http://goodnaijagirl.com/">GoodNaijaGirl</a> and more. And to my writing mentors: <a href="http://christianwriteruk.blogspot.com/">Abidemi Sanusi</a> and Dr Tade.</div><div><br /></div><div>I'm thankful for another peaceful, happy and fulfilling year of marriage. I know I am so blessed and privileged to share my life with a man that makes me happy, believes in me, loves me, supports me and wants the best for me.</div><div><br /></div><div>I'm thankful because I'm older and wiser now, than I was a year ago.</div><div><br /></div><div>I'm thankful for protection and safety. I went through 2009 without any accidents - amazing.</div><div><br /></div><div>I'm thankful for the trips around Europe I enjoyed during the year.</div><div><br /></div><div>I'm thankful for the progress I made with my work this year. And the opportunities I have to explore further in the coming months.</div><div><br /></div><div>I'm thankful to my co-writers on our blog series: Latifa, Jaycee, Icepick, Flourishing Florida, Diamond Hawk, Ayodele, Writefreak and Rayo. Thanks for believing in my idea and working with me.</div><div><br /></div><div>I'm thankful because I've moved closer to God this year. </div><div><br /></div><div><b>I'm also thankful for the many lessons I've learnt this year:</b></div><div><br /></div><div>I've learnt to depend on God more than ever</div><div><br /></div><div>I've learnt that respecting my husband is the key to a peaceful marriage</div><div><br /></div><div>I've learnt to be more patient</div><div><br /></div><div>I've learnt to appreciate the important things in life</div><div><br /></div><div>I've learnt not to compare myself with anybody</div><div><br /></div><div>I've learnt that I should choose carefully whose opinions I take on board</div><div><br /></div><div>I've learnt to receive criticism graciously</div><div><br /></div><div>I've learnt that a positive attitude wins in the end, even in the face of overwhelming odds.</div><div><br /></div><div>I've learnt that pride and sacrificial love are not compatible.</div><div><br /></div><div>I've learnt to be humble and content with what, who and where I am at the moment.</div><div><br /></div><div><b>For 2010:</b></div><div><br /></div><div>I want to be completely in tune with where God wants me to be, what God wants me to do and at His perfect timing.</div><div><br /></div><div>I want to be more and more like Jesus everyday.</div><div><br /></div><div>I want to achieve my potential with my writing.</div><div><br /></div><div>I want to become a better wife, sister, daughter and friend.</div><div><br /></div><div>So help me God.</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><b>Now I'm counting down to 2010........................!!!</b></div><div><b><br /></b></div><div><b>Happy New Year to everyone! May 2010 be the best year ever in all aspects of our lives!</b></div><div><b><br /></b></div><div><b>I'm off to church in a few hours. How will you see in the new year?</b></div><div class="blogger-post-footer">Tolulope Popoola: Writer, Blogger, Publisher, Dreamer, Bookworm.
Blog: http://www.onwritingandlife.com
Facebook: http://facebook.com/TolulopePopoola
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TolulopePopoola
Publishing: http://www.accomplishpress.com</div>Favoured Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06799796628809329966noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8411513974227018754.post-4662479565583208862009-12-30T01:12:00.000+00:002010-01-27T20:38:16.644+00:00As The Year Draws to a CloseHey everyone! Hope you had a Merry Christmas and you are rounding up 2009 on a great note. I had a nice time over the Christmas period, with time spent hanging out with family and friends. And of course, lots of things to eat, and the exchanging of gifts. Apart from the small hitch of some of my Christmas shopping being delayed in the post, and hence some people not getting their presents, it was all good.<br /><div><br /></div><div>That is, until I heard the news about the Nigerian terrorist. Until that Boxing Day, I never thought I would hear of a Nigeria attempting a suicide bombing... ever. In fact, for many hours, I was at a gathering of friends and we were all speculating that perhaps the guy was not even a real Nigerian, and was just an imposter posing with a Nigerian passport. Until CNN, Sky News and the BBC released (and keep releasing) further details of who he is and the stories surrounding how he became a terror suspect. I have read countless blogs, articles and commentaries about the story and all the angles, even some wild, crazy speculations. All I can say is, the guy did Nigeria as a nation and all Nigerians no favours at all. It's hard enough trying to shake off the negative images we already have as fraudsters, a corrupt nation, a failed state, etc now we have to deal with the added 'terrorist' tag. I can just imagine how much more difficult it will be for ordinary, decent, honest and hardworking Nigerians to get a visa, or travel around the world. I know how I feel every time I travel around Europe and my passport is given extra attention at immigration desks, and I am subjected to extra scrutiny. This latest incident will only make it worse. Sigh.<br /></div><div><br /></div><div>So what can I do? As one person, I can only continue to uphold Nigeria's name by showing the rest of the world that one individual's actions cannot and should not define who the rest of us are, as a nation. I will continue to proudly declare that I am a Nigerian, and no, I am not fraudulent, neither do I have any intentions of blowing up airplanes.</div><div><br /></div><div>Moving on, I am thankful to be alive to see 2009 coming to an end. It really did fly by so quickly! Thankfully, I'm ending the year with many many many reasons to be grateful to God. I've grown older and wiser, learnt many lessons, received tangible and intangible blessings, made new friends, travelled to new places, enjoyed some new experiences and fulfilled some dreams. Yes, it's been a wonderful year. </div><div><br /></div><div>I'm looking forward to 2010, it looks like it's going to be a very interesting year. Here is wishing everyone a wonderful year 2010! May we spend the year in perfect health, may we move many steps forward in achieving our dreams and may we all be far better people in 2010 than we've ever been. Happy New Year in advance!</div><div class="blogger-post-footer">Tolulope Popoola: Writer, Blogger, Publisher, Dreamer, Bookworm.
Blog: http://www.onwritingandlife.com
Facebook: http://facebook.com/TolulopePopoola
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TolulopePopoola
Publishing: http://www.accomplishpress.com</div>Favoured Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06799796628809329966noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8411513974227018754.post-59485862701817243882009-12-10T16:11:00.000+00:002010-01-27T20:38:16.646+00:00My.First.Rejection.LetterI got my first rejection letter from a publisher yesterday. It is a rite of passage for every aspiring author :) In fact I got a text from my published writer friend to say congrats! Apparently it means I am now a real writer! lol.<br /><br />As far as rejection letters go, this one's not too bad actually. The publisher said <i>"Unfortunately with the publishing industry in it's current state, I felt your novel would not be commercial enough"</i>. I want to remain positive, so I will take that to mean the novel was not completely rubbish, and her rejection is simply down to economics and timing. I've heard of editors giving some really funny reasons for rejecting a novel to the tune of <i>"Do yourself a favour and don't give up the day job"</i>! So FG will pick herself up and carry on. As someone else said, it can only mean I'm one step closer to meeting the right publisher.<br /><br />The fear of rejection was one of the things I was so worried about when I first decided to start writing, but I think I've had to see it as one of the things that come with the business side of writing, and not take it personally. Even the most successful authors who have won long lists of awards for their writing had to face rejection at some point. Determination and resilience is an essential strength to have in this game, and a thick skin is also very useful!<br /><br />On to other news:<br /><br />To say a big thank you to our readers and supporters, we are running a competition and giveaway for the next three weeks on our series blog! Check it out! This is the first one and entries will close on Monday the 14th. There will be two more competitions and prizes until Christmas, so make sure you click over to the blog now and enter. You could be a winner!<br /><br />Hope you enjoy the rest of the week and have a great weekend ahead.<br /><br />FG<div class="blogger-post-footer">Tolulope Popoola: Writer, Blogger, Publisher, Dreamer, Bookworm.
Blog: http://www.onwritingandlife.com
Facebook: http://facebook.com/TolulopePopoola
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TolulopePopoola
Publishing: http://www.accomplishpress.com</div>Favoured Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06799796628809329966noreply@blogger.com21tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8411513974227018754.post-3842807549399482442009-11-19T21:52:00.002+00:002010-02-18T21:51:13.493+00:00More Internal MusingsYesterday around 6.00pm, I was on the concourse at Liverpool Street station. This might sound like a rather random or mundane bit of information for me to be blogging about. But right there, in the hustle and bustle, the crush of commuters, the sea of suits and ties surrounding me, I suddenly realised that I was no longer a part of <em>them</em>. Yes, them. The City of London workers. The impatient mob of commuters, rushing for trains, jostling and elbowing anyone in their path, every determined step they take, timed to perfection to catch their train, with the platform number programmed in their head, a quick snatch of the evening newspaper to read on the train, and a satisfied smile if they find a seat in the carriage nearest to their exit at their destination. Some of them, on the phone speaking to husbands, wives or children, telling them "I'm on my way home now honey, just about to catch the 6.18 train". Some of them making plans or changing plans with friends they were supposed to meet up with after work.<br /><br />I used to be among that crowd and yesterday, I paused for a few moments on the concourse and thought how different my life is now. I have been out of the 9 - 5 for fifteen months, and by yesterday I already felt like an outsider. Not that at I'm complaining at all. I used to think that was the only way to live, that was the only way to work - being an accountant working in Central London, facing commuter hell Monday to Friday. I wrote <a href="http://favouredgirl.blogspot.com/2006/10/commuting-hell.html">this post</a> in October 2006, and at the time, I was fed up with the lifestyle and I knew I could not carry on with the 9 - 5 indefinitely. I was thinking that I needed to find a job where I didn't have to commute like that everyday. It has been three years since I wrote that post, and I am so glad and grateful to God, that my little dream is coming true. Even if it's something as small as having the freedom to work from home. I may not have the millions (yet), but my quality of life is already vastly improved. Hmmm, I may revisit this topic in another three years' time.<br /><br />So what was I even doing in Liverpool Street in the thick of the evening rush hour? I was on my way to a Creative Writing class at the Southbank Centre. I had attended one last month and I enjoyed it very much, so I was looking forward to learning new ideas yesterday. And I did. The tutor talked about blogging, writing short stories for traditional print publications, and also writing for an online audience. I made a note of many of the good points he raised, and I will be implementing some new ideas. One idea I'm taking further is our <a href="http://inmydreamsitwassimpler.blogspot.com/">blog series</a>, so keep an eye on it and I'll be letting you all know what's coming next.<br /><br />I can't believe the year is drawing to a close so quickly. I was almost alarmed when I looked at the date today and saw it was 19th of November. It's like I blinked and seven months of the year just flew by me! The thought makes me feel like I have to redeem the time wisely, everyday I have to achieve something. It may be learning a new life lesson, it may be finding a better way to do something, it may be gaining a new level of knowledge about myself, it may be drawing just that little bit closer to God and having more of His grace rubbing off on me, it may be encouraging a friend, it may be becoming a better wife. <em>Everyday, I feel like I should be a better person when I go to bed, than I was when I woke up.</em><br /><br />Okay, I'm off to make the most of the remaining minutes of this day, I'll be back soon with another update. Enjoy the rest of the week.<br /><br />FG<div class="blogger-post-footer">Tolulope Popoola: Writer, Blogger, Publisher, Dreamer, Bookworm.
Blog: http://www.onwritingandlife.com
Facebook: http://facebook.com/TolulopePopoola
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TolulopePopoola
Publishing: http://www.accomplishpress.com</div>Favoured Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06799796628809329966noreply@blogger.com18